A year ago, I had hopes. Directions. A sense of where God was leading. In many ways, those things have come to pass. Writing has returned with clarity and purpose. Family life is strong, grounded, and deeply meaningful. The work God placed in my hands is moving forward, not rushed, but real.

But there is one place where the picture has not fully matched reality yet.

I am not pastoring a church.

And that is not because the desire disappeared. It is because the timing was not right.

There was a season when stepping back into that fire would have been premature. God was still forming something deeper in both me and my wife. Not our gifting. Not our ability. Our why. The reason beneath the calling. The clarity beneath the passion. The foundation beneath the responsibility.

That kind of formation cannot be hurried. It takes time. It takes honesty. It takes letting God strip away the parts of the calling that are driven by expectation rather than obedience.

For almost six years, that work has been happening quietly. Faithfully. Sometimes painfully. Always intentionally.

And now, that season is changing.

The why has been formed. The clarity has settled. The fire is no longer something to fear or avoid. It is something we are prepared to enter again, with humility, conviction, and a deeper dependence on God than we have ever known.

So no, my life today is not exactly what I pictured a year ago.

BUT… it is better formed.

And now, we begin to look again.